Ave Maria

"You are my heaven on Earth

You are my last, my first

And then I hear this voice inside

Ave Maria...."

-Beyonce, "Ave Maria"

On December 23, 2008 at 9:03 pm, the most wonderful thing happened to me. I gave birth to a beautiful human being by the name of Abrielle Destinee Guy. She weighed in at 7lbs, 15 oz. and measured 20 3/4 inches. After she was born, she was placed in my arms and I could nothing but cry. It was one of most beautiful experiences I could have ever went through.

When she opened her eyes to look into mine, I was overwhelmed with this rush of emotions that I had never felt before. I was so wrapped up in her that I hardly paid attention to anything else. This was my child. My babygirl. No one else's, but mines. The feeling was surreal and extremely emotional for me that I held her so close to me and I didn't want to let go....

I was so excited to finally meet this person that had been growing inside me and shower her with all my love. This is what I had been preparing my mind, body, and soul for all those months, and the time had finally come. I left all my baggage from my past behind that night and started anew. My journey had come to an end and it had finally hit me that I had someone else to take care of and I had to start taking responsibility for ALL of my actions.

Even though I regretted being pregnant at first, and I felt so ashamed and disappointed in myself, I thank God for blessing me with this wonderful gift. Her eyes, her smile, her hands, her feet, her arms, her legs, and everything else about her brings me joy everytime I look at her. I used to feel that I wasn't going to be able to take care of her at times, but she has become my determination and drive to do all within my willpower to give her the world and more....

"I understand your language, your baby talk
You forgot to crawl, before you walked
There you are just looking so beautiful
And all the while
You're wrapped in blankets
You are my love child....

Thanks for my child
I'm really thanking you, the man above
Thanks for my child
You brought me so much joy, this bundle of love
Thanks for my child
And though you daddy, he ran away free
The love I have for you, baby
Is the love I have in me...."

-Cheryl 'Pepsii' Riley, "Thanks for My Child"